After I no longer had to feel stupid about finding him worth my attention, I began to open up. We became friends. Turns out I had to try too hard to keep him from seeing the smile behind my eyes. Then I began to see his eyes were smiling back. I thought maybe he felt the same way. His eyes were smiling at me too, but he never did anything about it. I started to think he was a just a flirt, you know, one of THOSE guys. Then on Valentine’s Day I found a king-sized snickers bar with a “secret note” sitting on the windshield of my car. With that came a long phone conversation between two people who aren’t phone people followed by the perfect Chattanooga date experience. He parked his car on 4th street and we walked across the walking bridge for some Clumpie’s ice-cream in Coolidge Park. Who knows how long we spent on that park bench talking about everything over a scoop of Oreo ice cream I forgot I was going to share. It was perfect. I learned that there was so much more to this guy than the mystery of the kid-loving California boy with long hair and tattoos. Then a walk back to his car, then a “not wanting the night to end” statement said by this boy, and a walk to the downtown hotel to see my mom and my sister who had just arrived for a weekend visit. It was in a conversation with my mom that the move back to Claremont first came up. I remember a bit of my giddiness easing, but not disappearing. I made a mental note not to fall for him, just to enjoy it while it lasted.
That plan didn’t last very long. This picture was taken just a few weeks later on a weekend spring break camping adventure at Cloudland Canyon. Never had Brian had such a large gulp of outdoor air…aside from the sandy west coast beaches. On the first morning of the two-night camping trip with a small group of our friends, we awoke to the surprise of three inches of unexpected snow. IT WAS COLD! Very, very cold. But it didn’t stop us from taking in the beauty of the place we came to see. We hiked and saw it all under a thick blanket of snow through the small opening between our face-warmers and our hoodies We were trialing a group of experienced outdoorsman. This type of exploring was nothing new to them. It was as if they were making a game of it. How much can we see? How fast can we get there? Brian and I were too busy being amazed at the quiet beauty that surrounded us, and taking in what was beginning to develop between us. We let them go ahead. There wasn’t much to say. Well really there was too much to say. So we didn’t say much at all. He didn’t say what he thought might scare me away. I was just trying not to let him hear me telling myself that I couldn’t fall for him.
The next morning our friends had to hit the road for home. And the cold snap followed them right out of the park. Because as soon as we were ready to walk around again, there was no need for ski jackets, long-johns, and gloves. We left the tent in just pants and long-sleeved shirts. Not too long after that, a tee-shirt was plenty. It went from feeling like a spring break ski trip in Colorado to feeling like a spring break should feel. And that is the condition you have found me in the picture.
We were nearing the end of our hike and there was a moment where my heart ignored my head. And then it was too late. I know the moment that my heart decided that it didn’t care what lied ahead. I wouldn’t let myself believe it was love until later, but it was. My heart knew what my head ignored. It knew the wall I had built around it wouldn’t be there for long. So there I am in the tree. Brian is standing on the ground laughing at me sitting up in the tree that was bent in such a way that it begged to climb into. And I am looking back at him with a face that is somewhat mad that he had let me fall for him, yet not mad enough to hide my smile. Little did I know that the man behind the camera had already decided he wasn’t leaving me behind…ever. Somehow he knew it would be worth it.
Picture #1
February 16, 2010
Worth more than a thousand words: 1117
by Meredith
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